Had it up to here with these messy, dirty rat bastard ...


Posted On: Monday - January 2nd 2017 9:23AM MST
In Topics: 
  Curmudgeonry

... squirrels, I'm writing about. (Why, who'd you think?). Where I live, these creatures - to be generous - are real troublemakers. Besides taking all the nuts off the trees way before they are ripe, they can chew through wiring, and they have been making stashes of their current nut holdings in and among storage boxes all around.

You try to shoot some, and then you feel bad looking at them. Poisoning will be my new method soon, and what everyone, including we at peakstupidity.com, needs to remember about these squirrels is that they are nothing but bushy-tailed rats. That's all they are - members of the disease-carrying, tree-hugging, wire-chewing, long-despised, dysfunctional RODENT family. There, now I'm ready to take them out.

"If I get stoned and chew wires all night long, it's a FAMILY TRADITION!" (h/t Hank, Junior)



We were able to shoot one red burning-ball of a roman candle right up into the nest in a tree one year on July 4th. The nest lit-up, the bushy-tailed rats started bailing, and then the whole thing smoked for 10 minutes. It was a scene, man!

OK, I'm setting up a topic key called Curmudgeory right after this post - there's gonna be a lot of stuff in it ;-}

Comments:
Moderator
Sunday - April 26th 2020 3:52PM MST
PS: Yeah, our new cat used to try, but my son saw him get in a stand-off with one of them, and I think he's scared when he ever gets close enough to begin with. Yes, when the SHTF, fried squirrel, sauteed squirrel, boiled squirrel, can't wait!
Adam Smith
Sunday - April 26th 2020 12:58PM MST
PS:They are pretty cute for bushy-tailed wire-chewing rats.

My cat tells me they're an excellent source of fresh, tasty red meat, meow. She eats them brains first.

If the SHTF maybe I'll find out how tasty they are.
WHAT SAY YOU? : (PLEASE NOTE: You must type capital PS as the 1st TWO characters in your comment body - for spam avoidance - or the comment will be lost!)
YOUR NAME
Comments