Posted On: Wednesday - November 19th 2025 7:46PM MST
In Topics:   Humor  US Feral Government  ctrl-left  Legal Stupidity  Guns

Foamies, ear muffs, full-out headsets, they're all part of that PPE - Personal Protective Equipment - that we've been hearing so much about since the Kung Flu set in almost 5 years back. Or, maybe you haven't heard so much about it ... cause, if not PPE, it's probably peanut butter. (There's so much other PPE - these are just for your ears of course.)
People from the Government want every one of us Americans to be safe. Hearing loss is no laughing matter. I said, HEARING LOSS IS NO LAUGHING MATTER! OSHA has come up with all the standards for the PPE to keep us safe from loud noises.
Then, there is the ATF, and sometimes E, Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms, sometimes Explosives, competing with Bass Pro Shops/Cabelas and other big box stores for your business. No, that's not it - the ATF/E is a Bureau of the US Feral Government, there to keep us safe from Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms, and sometimes Explosives.
Due to that pesky Amendment II in the Constitution, the ATF has been severely hampered in its ability to stop the sale, ownership, and use of guns in this country. The Bureau just tries to control them... for our safety. Problem is, some of the guns are REALLY loud! It's one thing out at the range or in the woods, where people use that PPE when necessary. American inner cities, OTOH, are PPE deserts. As always seems to be the case, with gun noise too, it's the minorities that have been hardest hit. (The bullets aren't pain-free either, BTW.)
Go to the ghetto sometime*. You'll see what we mean hear. The poor minorities there are literally bombarded with handgun noise, day-in and day-out. There are decibel/pitch charts that the OSHA folks could kindly distribute to the folks in the ghetto for their own safety. That should be done, but the Trump administration cares not a whit about hearing loss in the ghetto. Many young Black! men these days will not live to be 40 ... without some noticeable hearing loss.
Peak Stupidity knows this is a problem desperate for a solution. Is there any other solution besides mandating the wearing of foamies by black people as assigned by zip code? That leans a bit Totalitarian - may as well require, haha, medical face masks or something that THAT ridiculous. Wait...
[DEVELOPING!] Peak Stupidity has just learned that some firearms manufacturers sell what might be called IPE, Impersonal Protective Equipment. You may have heard of these things - they're often called suppressors or silencers.

Eureka! That's the ticket! These things greatly lower gunfire noise, even for those individuals NOT wearing PPE. The US Government should mandate noise suppressors for all guns, NOW! They should be required to come free with any gun purchase, just as they did for our safety with those trigger locks. (Yeah, they're in there... I know, it does look like part of the shipping material... [/Newhart])
On behalf of OSHA and all Americans who want to keep their hearing, the Peak Stupidity staff has just gotten done making an urgent phone call to ATF Acting Director Dan Driscoll. We weren't able to get anybody to talk with us, even after mashing 14 zeros, so we went to the ATF, yeah, web portal. After entering our suggestion about some rule-making regarding these safety devices, along with our names, birthplaces, number, make, model and number of guns we own, a scan of our latest audit of our ammo supply, info on our BMIs, scars, and tattoos, we submitted it all for perusal by the Assistant to the Acting Director.
While waiting on their portal to thoroughly vet us, Peak Stupidity staffers checked out some other ATF material on-line. Lo and behold, you wouldn't believe this: Not only does the ATF not yet require suppressors be given away to gun owners, they actively regulate them, making them hard to even BUY! Even AI agrees:
Possessing an unregistered silencer can lead to severe penalties, including fines of up to $10,000 per item and potential prison sentences of up to ten years. It's crucial to follow the regulations set by the National Firearms Act to avoid these legal consequences.Fined?! There should be fines for NOT having noise suppressors! People are going deaf due to you rogue ATF bastards. No, hear me out, minorities are being hardest hit! First there's the noise, and then there's the 9mm round.
In the sad case of OSHA v ATF, the Peak Stupidity court rules for the plaintiff, which would be OSHA. A motion for a stay is hereby issued to restrain the prior injunction.
In other words, Mandatory Gun Suppressors now! Mandatory and FREE!
PS: The idea for this satirical post came from my friend Rick. Nice idea. I hope this post fleshed it out pretty well. We're not at Babylon Bee level yet though ...
* Peak Stupidity hereby certifies that we take no, ZERO, ยกnunca! responsibility for any theft, death, or dismemberment resulting from any of our advice given herein. [PS Legal Dept]
Comments:
Moderator
Thursday - November 20th 2025 11:13AM MST
PS: BTW, the flags were STILL at half-mast, just yesterday anyway! WTH, man, is Ace Frehley THAT important?! Hmmmm, just maybe he is ...
Moderator
Thursday - November 20th 2025 11:12AM MST
PS: I just finished another post, Adam. Thanks for the books! I'll respond later to your 2nd comment here.
Adam Smith
Thursday - November 20th 2025 11:03AM MST
PS: Good afternoon, Messrs. SafeNow & Newman!
NFA regulations hit ๐๐ฅ๐๐๐ค๐ฌ! hardest!
(Or something like that...)
๐๐๐๐ฆ ๐ฆ๐๐ข๐๐ ๐๐ฅ๐๐๐ค! ๐๐๐ ๐กโ๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐ฆ๐ ๐ค๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ก ๐๐๐ฃ๐ ๐ก๐ ๐๐ 40...
Apparently, being killed by a "government" employee is the sixth most common cause of death for American men between the ages of 25 and 29 of all races and is not limited to urban settings. If we had better access to the statistics I'm sure we would find that ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ฆ ๐ "๐๐๐ฃ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ก" ๐๐๐๐๐๐ฆ๐๐ is more common for melanated urban youth from the dark side of town than it is for White men in flyover country. (Though it still happens. We've had two such cases here in Lumpkinville in the last few years. Cops really be wildin'.)
They say that after the first of the year there will no longer be a $200 fee for the suppressor tax stamp. Apparently, you still have to fill out ๐ด๐๐น ๐น๐๐๐ 4 and have a permission slip from mommygov to own one.
But I agree with Achmed. Free suppressors for all!
(Gotta save those ears.)
https://www.opticsplanet.com/sportear-m4-with-4-directional-mics.html
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IjoiXYSyNk8&lc
๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ข๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ก๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ก๐ ๐ ๐๐ฃ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ก๐๐๐ , ๐๐๐๐๐ข๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ข๐ ๐ก๐ $10,000 ๐๐๐ ๐๐ก๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ก๐๐๐ก๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐ก๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ข๐ ๐ก๐ ๐ก๐๐ ๐ฆ๐๐๐๐ .
Meanwhile, in other news...
Accepting payment or barter for hooking up A/C hoses without an EPA ยง 608 certification can result in federal fines of up to $69,733 per day for initial violations! (And potential criminal charges.)
https://www.crowell.com/en/insights/client-alerts/alert-yes-inflation-affects-everything-epa-increases-fines-for-civil-non-compliance
https://www.epa.gov/section608/section-608-technician-certification-requirements
That commerce clause really is a bitch... (Anyway...)
I hope you all have a great day! โฎ๏ธ
NFA regulations hit ๐๐ฅ๐๐๐ค๐ฌ! hardest!
(Or something like that...)
๐๐๐๐ฆ ๐ฆ๐๐ข๐๐ ๐๐ฅ๐๐๐ค! ๐๐๐ ๐กโ๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐ฆ๐ ๐ค๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ก ๐๐๐ฃ๐ ๐ก๐ ๐๐ 40...
Apparently, being killed by a "government" employee is the sixth most common cause of death for American men between the ages of 25 and 29 of all races and is not limited to urban settings. If we had better access to the statistics I'm sure we would find that ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ฆ ๐ "๐๐๐ฃ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ก" ๐๐๐๐๐๐ฆ๐๐ is more common for melanated urban youth from the dark side of town than it is for White men in flyover country. (Though it still happens. We've had two such cases here in Lumpkinville in the last few years. Cops really be wildin'.)
They say that after the first of the year there will no longer be a $200 fee for the suppressor tax stamp. Apparently, you still have to fill out ๐ด๐๐น ๐น๐๐๐ 4 and have a permission slip from mommygov to own one.
But I agree with Achmed. Free suppressors for all!
(Gotta save those ears.)
https://www.opticsplanet.com/sportear-m4-with-4-directional-mics.html
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IjoiXYSyNk8&lc
๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ข๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ก๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ก๐ ๐ ๐๐ฃ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ก๐๐๐ , ๐๐๐๐๐ข๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ข๐ ๐ก๐ $10,000 ๐๐๐ ๐๐ก๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ก๐๐๐ก๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐ก๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ข๐ ๐ก๐ ๐ก๐๐ ๐ฆ๐๐๐๐ .
Meanwhile, in other news...
Accepting payment or barter for hooking up A/C hoses without an EPA ยง 608 certification can result in federal fines of up to $69,733 per day for initial violations! (And potential criminal charges.)
https://www.crowell.com/en/insights/client-alerts/alert-yes-inflation-affects-everything-epa-increases-fines-for-civil-non-compliance
https://www.epa.gov/section608/section-608-technician-certification-requirements
That commerce clause really is a bitch... (Anyway...)
I hope you all have a great day! โฎ๏ธ
Peak Stupidity Book Club
Thursday - November 20th 2025 11:03AM MST
PS: Good afternoon, gentlemen,
I uploaded these like forever ago.
There's no reason I've waited so long to post the links...
The Executioner's Song 4.4mb .pdf
https://tinyurl.com/3h557d9e
https://files.catbox.moe/zngtil.pdf
The Executioner's Song 5.4mb .epub
https://tinyurl.com/3ju93hz9
https://files.catbox.moe/xlgmka.epub
Cheers! โฎ๏ธ
I uploaded these like forever ago.
There's no reason I've waited so long to post the links...
The Executioner's Song 4.4mb .pdf
https://tinyurl.com/3h557d9e
https://files.catbox.moe/zngtil.pdf
The Executioner's Song 5.4mb .epub
https://tinyurl.com/3ju93hz9
https://files.catbox.moe/xlgmka.epub
Cheers! โฎ๏ธ
Moderator
Thursday - November 20th 2025 7:13AM MST
PS: Haha! I like your constructive3 ideas, SafeNow. A funeral should be a solemn time. Even if a guy from the other gang shows up, you should diss him quietly, and he could obey Sailer's Law of Mass Shooting in a respectful manner.
SafeNow
Thursday - November 20th 2025 4:47AM MST
PS
A thoughtful proposal, Mr. Moderator, but it is incomplete without also furnishing silencer accessories. An online โunboxingโ aka โwhatโs in the boxโ video would explain to recipients how to use the silencer accessories. For example, when using at a funeral, a tiny stick-on religious-cross decal and โRIPโ would be affixed to the barrel. This way the priest is not offended that his funeral got shot-up, plus it would look good at the sentencing.
Politics and tight budgets being what they are, silencers wonโt be just handed-out without requiring a co-pay. Thus, donโt forget that Food-Stamps regulations must be amended to allow the copay to be paid for using food stamps.
A thoughtful proposal, Mr. Moderator, but it is incomplete without also furnishing silencer accessories. An online โunboxingโ aka โwhatโs in the boxโ video would explain to recipients how to use the silencer accessories. For example, when using at a funeral, a tiny stick-on religious-cross decal and โRIPโ would be affixed to the barrel. This way the priest is not offended that his funeral got shot-up, plus it would look good at the sentencing.
Politics and tight budgets being what they are, silencers wonโt be just handed-out without requiring a co-pay. Thus, donโt forget that Food-Stamps regulations must be amended to allow the copay to be paid for using food stamps.
๐ต๐๐, ๐กโ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ค๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ผ๐ฟ๐ฟ ๐๐ก โ๐๐๐-๐๐๐ ๐ก...
We haven't been to town yet (we'll be going later for some groceries) but it seems like most times we go to town the flags are at half mast. (Sometimes more like 1/3.)
Mrs. Smith and I agree with you.
The 1/2 mast thing is really getting out of hand.
Speaking of ๐๐๐ก๐ก๐๐๐ ๐๐ข๐ก ๐๐ โ๐๐๐... (๐ถ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ฆ ๐๐ ๐ค๐๐๐๐๐'...)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HvEkimMWc20
https://www.fox23.com/news/muskogee-police-review-timeline-leading-up-to-fatal-shooting-of-suspect/article_1d07ab90-8578-4d3d-b5c3-402a54d32cd4.html
https://www.newson6.com/story/688b9d0696fa76b156e531e2/muskogee-man-dies-in-gunfire-exchange-with-police-during-incident-at-home
Will the flag be lowered for Clayton Bailey?
(Moar seriously though...)
Let this be a warning to all would be grass ordinance scofflaws...
Land of the Free, Bitchez! โฎ๏ธ