Dreitaus end fünf hundert scheiße ballons - the Cold War in the age of Peak Stupidity

Posted On: Friday - June 7th 2024 8:04PM MST
In Topics: 
  Commies  Humor  World Political Stupidity

Hey, the Cold War was serious business 40 years ago, when pretty young German pop singer Nena wrote the lyrics to Neun und neunzig Luftballons.* Now, with one of the last remaining Cold War Commie hold-outs, North Korea, still facing its arch-enemy to the south, full of other Koreans, across the DMZ during this temporary cease-fire that's been going on for 71 years, serious action has been taken by the North.

"What?! Have the nukes finally been launched?!" "Did they shoot down a spy plane and capture the pilot as a hostage?!"

No, but, the North has started bombing the South. The Cold War has again become a hot war in the Koreas. Per the Gateway Pundit, North Korea’s ‘Rocket Man’ Kim Jon Un Halts the ‘Excrement Balloon War’ Against South Korea.

Wait, a bit let down, are we? Had you already gotten into the shelter, loaded up the AR's, and started opening some of the #10 cans of black beans? I'm sorry to tell you, but this is the state of the Cold War in the age of Peak Stupidity.
North Korea has reportedly agreed to stop flying hundreds of balloons carrying trash and manure to South Korea, saying that the southerners now ‘have enough experience of how much unpleasant they feel’.
The threat is still there, though. It's ubiquitous. It's in the very air. The South is not feeling the searing heat of a thousand suns, a blast wave that takes down blocks of apartment buildings like houses of cards, and severe radiation poisoning. Still, trash or cow manure might fall on your roof. That can be unpleasant.

This is not 1949 or 1953 Berlin, or early 1960s Cuba. The remains of the Cold War are less deadly but more stupid. The latest dispatches out of the Orient report that the South has responded in kind:
The wire reported observers’ claims that South Korea was likely going to restart front-line loudspeaker broadcasts into North Korea, criticizing the country for violating human rights while also broadcasting world news and K-pop songs.”
K-pop!! Is there any way to defuse the tensions? Some have suggested a "hot line" app, some sort of red icon on the cell phones of Messrs. Kim and Kim, be established, allowing open lines of communication and special secret emoticons.
No dangerous substances were said to be included at this time – but the possibility is there.
I've seen Fail Safe, Dr. Strangelove, and Strategic Air Command. Manure could be dropped accidentally, triggering a MAD, MAD, MAD, MAD, MAD scenario. (Manure Assured Destruction) Finally:
The South claims that ‘only’ 1,000 balloons were launched, but North Korea says as many as 3,500 balloons were launched carrying a total of 15 tons of waste.
Where are the other 2,500 balloons? Look up, and wake up, America! I for one, don't want to wake up under the weight of Communist manure!

PS: Dieter Kief... paging Mr.Kief, please pick up mint-green stupidity phone. Mr. Dieter Kief... I am not sure where the spaces go in the translation in our title.

* Peak Stupidity revisited this song, including novelty lyrics, with our post Ein groß weißer Luftballon - The Chinese a few years later.

Adam Smith
Saturday - June 8th 2024 10:42AM MST
PS: Only $20.56 each if you buy all three!

I finally figured out what I'm going to buy Mrs. Smith for her birthday!


Saturday - June 8th 2024 10:16AM MST
PS: 3 Kim Jong Un pillows left for 22 bucks. Buy it now!

Thanks for that, Adam, and I enjoyed the Red Hot Chili Peppers - song and video.
Adam Smith
Saturday - June 8th 2024 9:36AM MST
PS: Great news!


Adam Smith
Saturday - June 8th 2024 9:28AM MST
PS: Happy Saturday!


(So sorry, but the pillow cases are all sold out.)

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