I am the oyster woman, Goo goo g' joob!

Posted On: Tuesday - October 24th 2023 7:18PM MST
In Topics: 
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I'm not really sure how funny the previous post may have been to readers, but it was funny to me, just that thought driving by, "hey, he reminds me of.. who's that guy again, the weirdo Senator from Pennsylvania." Anyway, this one is funny, I don't care who ya' are.

From Instapundit, I clicked over to the website of a TV station in KVLT, out of Knoxville, Tennessee* which reports on a situation in Atlanta in which a Man skips out on paying tab after woman orders 48 oysters on first date. The unfortunate suitor had invited that fat broad to go out for drinks via TikTok. (TikTok, see, now that's your first mistake!)

That's the guy's date in the image above. She looks like she could take on 48 oysters, but then there was more... In the words of the Simpson family lawyer Lionel Hutz, "Do these sound like the actions of a woman who had ALL she could eat?" Unfortunately, this was not an all-you-can-eat joint, so the bill got up to $185. Per the article, "At some point, the man bailed. Bennett said he got up to go to the bathroom and never came back.

That reminds me of a Bruce Springsteen song about going out for a ride... then, the words of this lovely oyster connoisseur via text, "Running out on a tab is crazyyy" remind me of a Billy Joel song that mentions walking through Bedford Stuyvesant in NYC alone. Yeah, dating a girl with that big an ass, she may be right - he may be crazy.

Scene from an Italian restaurant , no, Cool Hand Luke , nay, Fontaine’s Oyster House:

Suitor: Why you got to go and say forty-eight oysters for? Why not thirty-five or thirty-nine?

His date: I thought it was a nice round number.

From the TV station article, "Most internet commenters were siding with the man, with one writing, 'If you eat 48 oysters in a day you are a walrus.'" I ain't the egg man, I am the oyster woman, I am the walrus. Goo goo g' joob!

* Of course. That's Instapundit's home turf.

Wednesday - October 25th 2023 3:00PM MST
PS: Mr. Blanc, no, I'm pretty sure the lady paid the restaurant, and then the gentleman noted that he would gladly pay just the drink tab in some further tiktok conversation. Young people!

Yeah, I think he made a nice move. Would have been even cooler if the bathroom had a window that he went out for his escape. Or, maybe there was a gun behind the toilet tank, and he went in a different direction ...

Scenes from an Italian Restaurant...
Wednesday - October 25th 2023 1:48PM MST
PS Well, certainly not the gentlemanly thing to do. But, as she is clearly not a lady, our chap probably is little inclined toward gentility. One hopes that the restaurant wasn’t stiffed.
Adam Smith
Wednesday - October 25th 2023 11:08AM MST
PS: Good afternoon, Achmed,

Yeah, Sophie is pretty cool.
I thought you might appreciate her.


Cheers! ☮
Wednesday - October 25th 2023 5:47AM MST
PS: Yes, she ordered some more stuff after that, Adam. That's why I put that line from the Simpsons, which sort of fit. I think it wasn't in the written story, or at least now - these pages change some over time.

However, I thought the video on the new station page was done so, I don't know, stupidity, that I didn't want to watch it again to get some quotes.

Re: your last link, hey, I like Dire Straits, and Knofler didn't have boobs like that!
Adam Smith
Tuesday - October 24th 2023 11:09PM MST
PS: One more thing...


Cheers! ☮
Adam Smith
Tuesday - October 24th 2023 10:08PM MST
PS: So, I uploaded her video to youtube...

I might use it someday as a reply to Ebony Obelisk or Tiny Duck or something...
(I also think it's funny as hell..)

“Why da fuck dis bitch ass nigger say he go to the bafroom and never come back???”*

* I would use this as the title to the youtube video, but I don't think youtube would let it fly...

Adam Smith
Tuesday - October 24th 2023 9:40PM MST
PS: Found the original video...


Cheers! ☮
Adam Smith
Tuesday - October 24th 2023 9:37PM MST
PS: Happy Wednesday morning, Mr. Moderator...

Fun Fact: Oysters are an aphrodisiac. (And they're delicious too!)

A dozen oysters at Fontaine's is only $15 (on Tuesday).
How/why the F‽ did she run up a $185 dollar tab.
What else did(n't) she eat/drink?


Oh, and, this seems almost obligatory...

Stay classy, Equana!

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