Comment on Republic Airlines dba United Express fiasco/infotainment

Posted On: Tuesday - April 18th 2017 7:28PM MST
In Topics: 
  General Stupidity  Humor  Americans

Except for a quick mention here along with an appropriate song lyric and music to placate the parrotheads, we have not mentioned that week-old dragging-the-passenger-off-the-plane incident. Hey, it's not like it is timely news that must be obtained hourly off the phone like the Dow Jones index or the current apparel being worn or pulled off of Miss Laura Kardashian (we hipsters call her LaurDash).

Anyhow, the main impression I have of the entire recorded part of this incident was the complete lack of civility or just normal thinking-human behavior on the part of about everybody involved. I won't get into all of the details about how everyone should have handled themselves, but it's the common theme witnessed of people behaving like incoherent kooks that cannot seem to make good judgements and talk well enough to keep the behavior civil.

You had your gate agents, and maybe you've got more details than me, but c'mon, up the ante a bit, do some small bit of thinking about who would be better to "request" a de-planing to, or just call up the bosses who can give authority for more resources to be used in this special case.

You had your security rent-a-cops who should never been called in the first place, as there was no criminal activity* going on or any that had happened. Their job then, since they WERE called, was to handle this guy, not to knock the crap out of him. 4 guys should be able to restrain the guy calmly (I know they had no business being sent to do so) without banging him around. An old fashioned peace-officer type could probably just have talked the guy into stepping off the plane eventually.

You had your nutty doctor, who should have just verbally raised holy hell up at the podium once off the plane. Let them know what trouble this will cause, whether people will die because you couldn't make it down to Louisville earlier. Screaming while being dragged down the aisle does not become a medical doctor, not unless he were getting arrested at a protest rally against free-market medicine or something.

Even the video takers acted like Jerry Springer guests. How about just a little calm dialogue, or if not that, just take some action, don't scream out stupid stuff while you're filming yourself.

The thing is, as bad as everything looked on here, it was one incident among perhaps thousands approaching this level of trouble that occur each year, but that are handled calmly. Maybe not everyone is happy with the outcomes, but they just don't usually make Americans out to be bloomin' idiots, like this particular piece of info-tainment, which is what it really was - a TV producer's dream - something to keep the viewers in front of the tube for most of a week.

As a friend of mine and I were discussing this, we came up with a couple of funny scenes that could have occurred. One was just better judgement by the agents as to what type of person should be (or given the most incentive to be) bumped. "Who else do we have on board? That guy's an engineer, no, leave him alone, oh, this guy runs a small company, don't bump him". "Attention, passengers, is there anyone on board for which it absolutely doesn't matter whether you get to Louisville tonight? Show of hands, please. OK, are there any of you for which it doesn't matter what happens to you today, tomorrow or any time, as in nobody cares really? Any government people, DMV, how about women's studies majors? Anyone? Anyone?"

The 2nd idea was a somewhat cryptic announcement over the aircraft P/A, something like: "These 4 passengers, please come out to the jetbridge to discuss your upgrades" might do the trick. As the passengers get fully on the bridge, one agent distracts them with a stack of bogus boarding passes while the other one starts backing up that bridge at full speed away from the plane. Finally, one passenger at a time gets that WTF?! look in his eyes. One of them takes a leap toward the still open main cabin door, but, alas, he is not really in shape and lands face down on the ramp. Hilarity ensues!

* Although, the fact that the man went back onto the plane makes him sort of like a stowaway in that sense, meaning that is a big deal and considered to be illegal due to TSA stupidity, not the airline's stupidity. In the old days, a stowaway was just a problem due to his not paying for his trip (and creation of a slight error in weight/balance for the airplane), but now it is a "big damn deal" because of our commie-inspired TSA, as his name was no longer connected with the flight after the agents first bumped him in the computer sense.

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