Junk mail under Idiocracy

Posted On: Friday - November 15th 2019 12:20PM MST
In Topics: 
  General Stupidity  Salesmen  Curmudgeonry  Artificial Stupidity

I've seen more junk mail in the past. A long time ago in a State far, far away, I lived in a rental house with about 5 other rental units nearby. The landlord kindly left a 13 gallon trash can right under the set of 6 outdoor mailboxes. It would fill up in a coupla weeks!

I don't know if it's worse or better that most of this "work" is being done on-line or on the phone nowadays. Most of the junk snail-mail, that without any plastic, is good for starting fires in the fireplace. Still, I've got to take a quick look, to see if it's junk mail or something actually important. The banks I have been a customer of have annoyed me to no end, suckering me into opening mail that I think is important, but is sales material.

The most frequent sender of junk mail to our place is a bank (I think) that is continually offering credit cards to my wife. It's just about weekly and has been going on for a few years now, saving me a few BTUs here and there. I just have to wonder what the hell runs their junk-mail-ad department. After 25 non-replies, you'd think a flag would get flipped in the database - |Unresponsive household = 1|, END ROW, END TABLE or something (I'm no SQL guy, so pardon me.) Some of this stuff probably only touches the human hands of the mailman and me. What's inside it comes from a printer, is never seen by eye, than turns into ash. What's the point?

Just imagine this mail-advertising "factory", mass-printing and collating material, with machines folding, spindling, mutilating, and nicely getting those 3 pages of wonderful offers into the printed envelopes. Other machines stack and pack these. Paper, lots of toner, and a digital signal from output of some old database could go into a black-box of a building, with junk-mail stacked on pallets coming out the other end. Who's in charge?

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