Can we put this whole Moon-Pie vs. Moon-Cake issue behind us?


Posted On: Saturday - February 3rd 2018 6:23PM MST
In Topics: 
  Humor  China  Americans



You've heard it all before, I GET THAT! [/Carlson]. Yes, the Chinese culture has been around for 5,000 years, that's 5 milleniums or MMMMM for you rubes in Rio Morono, Italia! OK, that's indeed a long time, so those Chinese Moon Cakes, shown above right, may have been around a while - please be careful, then, they have a chunk of egg inside. You know how that stuff gets after a few weeks.

On the left side, you've got your American freshly-Circle-K-purchased Moon Pies, whose manufacturer, errr, baker celebrated the product's, errr, food's 100th anniversary last year (the other thing I missed besides Billy Joel's Miami 2017). 100 years, it's like a century or C, 2 % as long in this world as moon cakes may possibly be.

The Chinese New Year, based on the lunar calendar will be celebrated in just under 2 weeks based on my last look at the moon, but the moon cake festival occurs in the late September or early October based again on the lunar calendar. It's fall over in China, meaning for us here in American it's autumn - weird. I really can't wait that long for some kind of snack, so, as an American, I would be prone to obtaining our traditional moon pie. At this time of year they are probably both on sale.

Now, when in China, at the proper time of year, you must eat moon cakes, of course, just so you don't get laughed at. However, keep in mind that the Chinese have no big culture of baking. They don't really have the sweet-tooth like us Westerners and especially Americans. You won't see many ovens even in modern housing over there even. These cakes are not really that tasty, is what I am getting at. Still, you've got to smile and stuff one more in your mouth, again only if it's not been sitting around a few weeks, on account of the piece of egg in the middle and all.

Now, with all the writing about immigration and related assimilation here on Peak Stupidity, what about the Chinese people that live here, permanantly some times? Should they not partake of our moon pies, and not just on the 15th day of the 8th lunar month, but every other night on the way home?

You say massive immigration is good, and we're all the melting pot? Prove it, bitchez! I want to see you, Mr. Tsao, and you, Miss KungPao, eating a good old moon pie, and not one of those new-fangled lemon ones either, a real chocolate/crusty/marshmellow-filled moon pie with a chocolate Yoohoo to chase it down with.

This is America, people - try to fit in, is all I'm saying here. YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED, or get diabetes, probably the latter.

Happy 101st anniversary, Moon Pie.

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